In addition to my last post: The back-pain the point on the left lower back is the manifested Self-doubt stemming from the Fall - Giving my complete power away to the mind and let it possess me -> Memory of killing the ants - Self-doubt, Mother(trust) is not there -> self-abuse/sadism Who am I when i enjoy entrapping and closing myself off? Entrapping life? lol because my girlfriend was not there...resentment!